Ever heard the old saying, ‘Make new friends, but keep the old. One is silver and the other gold.’
It’s a great sentiment, and it’s wonderful when you can keep the old friends, but metaphysically speaking, sometimes that’s just not practically wise.
Every relationship that we have reflects a part of ourselves. Healthy relationships reflect healthy souls. Unhealthy relationships — well, let’s just say they exist to show us all of the places that need healing. For example, if you have friends who walk all over you and don’t respect your feelings or your boundaries, then you’re being shown by the Universe that you need to develop more of a backbone. The same goes with your intimate relationships. If those who are closest to you lie to you and disrespect you, then you’re likely not being honest with yourself about something and you need to learn self-respect.
Sometimes we grow and we change and expect better things from those in our lives and they are able to provide those better things. In these cases, our relationships grow and change with us. We may not be as close as we once were or we may find that we become closer than ever. The relationship changes when both parties are willing and able to change to accommodate the needs of both parties.
But that doesn’t always happen. Sometimes we heal the wounded parts of ourselves that attracted those other people in the first place. However since we’ve healed that part of us, we no longer can stand to be around the person because our energy just doesn’t sync up. When this happens, we feel awkward around the person, we don’t have much to say to them, we don’t feel entirely safe sharing parts of ourselves or we argue and fail to communicate.
In these instances, it is sometimes best to cut someone off entirely. Here’s what happens when you don’t:
- When we stay in communication with someone that our energy doesn’t sync up with, we’re letting the Universe know that this is a type of relationship that we’re ok with. So don’t be surprised when your other relationships start to show the same qualities. Or don’t be shocked when you meet someone who does the same things to annoy you that the first person did.
- When we stay in communication with someone that our energy doesn’t sync up with, we have difficulty making new connections. You can’t say to yourself that you’ll break up with someone when you find someone new. The Universe doesn’t work that way. As long as you stay with the person, the Universe assumes you to be happy because you have not created a space that the Universe can fill. So you may want to meet new friends or a lover who understands you better, but until you start letting the old ones fall away, you’ll struggle to get that connection that you really seek.
There is one caveat. Sometimes there are people that we really can’t cut off entirely for a myriad of reasons. For example, it might be a family member that you still have to see. Or it might be a co-worker that you have to interact with. In this case, limit your interaction as much as possible. Your intention to limit the connection will convey to the Universe that you want something better, ushering in new relationships that work.